The inaugural 2022 week one OBB Florida power poll is FINALLY here. Where will your beloved Miami Hurricanes rank? Who are the cellar dwellers? How many “Keep Mike Norvell” T-shirts in orange and green do we order? So without further adieu, RACK EM!!!!!
1. Miami Hurricanes
Record (0-0) Next Opponent: Bethune Cookman at Hard Rock Stadium. The Hurricanes will be 1-0 and are the number one team in the state. Debate your mama. The Mario Cristobal era is here and the Hurricanes have the number one coaching staff in the state. Recruiting is up. Facilities are on the up and you have a potential first round quarterback in Tyler Van Dyke. Say less.
2. Florida Gators
Record (0-0) Next Opponent: Utah #7 at the Swamp. Sure, Bayou Billy has an overall record of 40-12 but the Gators are lucky to be this high. The Gators were 6-7 last year and Hurricanes fans know what hyping up a mid major coach looks like. A top-ten ranked Utah squad will make its trek all the way across the country to a place where the featured attraction is an Applebee’s on Archer street. A gator win will put them firmly in the driver’s seat for the number one spot next week. A loss? Locker time.
3. UCF Knights
Record (0-0) Next Opponent: South Carolina State at the Bounce House. Gus Malzahn got the Orlando commandos a 9-4 record last year. The proverbial kiddy table crew will finally join a power five conference but not this year. Bring on the mid majors. Odds makers are setting the season win total at 9.5 This seems about right and that was not trying to be disrespectful.
4. FAU Owls
Record (1-0) Previous Opponent: Win vs. Charlotte 43-13-Next Opponent: at Ohio. Hey nice dub for the Kosi Hive. Who has a better gig than slick Willy? Mark September 17th as a big one when the hooties play the knights in the friendly confines of Boca Raton. The pundits predict a 6-6 record for the Owls so they will probably slide down the power poll like a stripper at the end of her song.
5. Florida State Seminoles
Record (1-0) Previous Opponent: Win vs. Duquesne 47-7-Next Opponent at LSU. So 5-7 University is going to death valley to play that small little school in Baton Rouge. Coach Norvell has amassed an 8-13 record while at FSU so I don’t think this ranking is too low. Coach Brian Kelly and his awkward dry humping rotating recruit table wins this game big. Keep Norvell T-shirts will be mass produced.
6. USF Bulls
Record (0-0) Next Opponent: BYU at where Tom Brady Plays Home games. These guys have been cellar dwellers in the OBB power poll for like eons. The Bulls have to play BYU, at Florida, at Louisville, at Cincinnati and at Houston. That is five losses already in my book. This team will be lucky to win four games.
Record (0-0) Next Opponent: Bryant at FIU Football Stadium. Bring. Back. Butch. Ever since this team pulled off the miracle at Marlins park, they have sunk faster than a pirate walking the plank with lead boots. Butch is gone by the way and Mike MacIntyre takes the helm. Paws up everybody. This is going to be a long season.